Babies

What is it about our faith that makes people think they should know everything about everyone else's lives? I have been in situations where people completely over-share or ask me about things that are really pretty personal.

I think the worst over-share has to be when Mike's cousin told me that she wanted to nurse longer but that her son's teeth cam in and it started to hurt. Ewww! I know you are just loving the mental picture of that one.

So Mike and I have been married for almost three years and I just have to rant a little about how much people ask us when we are having kids. Our families tease us a little bit, which is fine. But I really can't believe those people who basically ask/tease you while in the line at your wedding! Our home teachers came over the other day and I seriously felt like it was a PPI. They asked us when we were having kids - straight faced, no smiles or teasing. Umm ... that is between me, Mike and the Lord. Then one of the laurels I teach asked me in front of a bunch of people and leaders the other day. At least she was teasing a little.

Seriously, what do people want you to say? If I were trying then it would ruin the announcement when I really was pregnant (which I guess most people do). If we were trying and things weren't working out, that is none of their business. And if that was the case it would make me feel really bad. The other answer is of course, that we are just not ready yet, which is the answer in our case.

I also feel that a lot of people are judging us when they ask how long we have been married and know that we don't have kids yet. They have no idea what could be going on in our lives. I think I get that vibe a lot too because we bought a fairly nice house. I feel like people think we are putting finances before kids.

It isn't finances, it isn't my career, it isn't like we don't know how important it is to start a family, we are just not emotionally ready. I have seen several of my friends who have pushed their husbands into having kids sooner than he wanted and it ended up being a huge stress on their marriage. The husband isn't as involved in the care of the baby as he might have been if he was excited to have a child rather than pushed. In one case the wife promised to do everything with the baby so it wouldn't interfere with the husbands life, if she could have a baby sooner. That isn't the way that I want to have my first kid. I want Mike to be excited.

I also want to be really excited. I feel like I go through week period where I want kids and then don't. If I have spent time with my niece or other cute kids have been around I want kids more. But then when the crying tantrum kids/babies are around I think, how can I be ready for this? I think with my own baby I will love it so much that I won't be as affected by the crying, but still I have times where I get scared.